Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
