worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize