if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
