I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I want to make a zoo with you.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
