They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
