just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
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