just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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