we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
