you would pick up someone in the library
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
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I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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