Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize