I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
sex in a hospital.. check
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
