omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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