Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
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