and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Randomize
