i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
