Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Randomize
