And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
