did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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