bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Randomize
