I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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