so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
