we'll go far in life on tits alone.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Randomize
