So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
