so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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