You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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