Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
