well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
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