Pappa wants mamma naked
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
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