im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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