He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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