So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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