When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
We just shotgunned beers for America
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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