My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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