Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize