oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
