Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
