so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
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