I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
