Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Sext me about skeletons
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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