Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Randomize
