You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
It was confusing and full of hummus
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
But break dance skills will only take you so far
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
