Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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