i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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