Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
