it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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