I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
