oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
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