And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
