The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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