I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
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