Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
